The age of prosperity

Article posted by BabyBarista blog on Guardian newspaper

HeadClerk made an announcement at chambers tea today. "With all this talk of cuts and a double dip recession, what we must not forget is that wherever there is hardship, there is opportunity."

"What? Insolvency, repossessions, divorce…?" asked TheCreep.

"Yes, we certainly need to be advertising in those traditional areas. But the biggest opportunity facing us at the moment is suing our lovely new coalition government."

"How's that?" asked TheVamp.

"Cuts, dear. Cuts," he replied. "For every contract the government cancels, we want to be suing for compensation. School buildings, workers, IT projects. It's huge and we need to be bringing in that work."

"What, like vultures?" said BusyBody.

"Do you think we're some kind of free-living hippy justice for all do-gooding girls brigade?" retorted OldSmoothie angrily.

For once he'd been offensive on so many different levels that it actually silenced BusyBody for a moment as her mind clocked all its different elements. Which left UpTights to step in with: "Maybe not. But a bit of self respect and decorum when the rest of the world's suffering wouldn't go amiss."

"That's a little ironic coming from you, don't you think," said OldSmoothie.

HeadClerk ignored all these comments and concluded without any hint of irony: "So I want everyone out there talking to the media about how terrible these cuts are and that the only people who are going to benefit are the lawyers."

Welcome to the age of prosperity (for lawyers, at least).

(Published by The Guardian – July 13, 2010)

latest top stories

subscribe |  contact us |  sponsors |  migalhas in portuguese |  migalhas latinoamérica